You have to understand that a marriage is a partnership or team. So for both members to be on a winning team you have to be on the same side.
This is where compatibility comes in. You have to be compatible to be a team.
Successful marriages have two people that are true friends at the core. They genuinely like each other through and through.
This means they prefer each others company to others, amuse each other and comfort each other.
Successful team members learn to trust each other, show their vulnerabilities to each other.
Learn to laugh together and give support when the time arises.
Keep in mind there will be some things you won’t like about your spouse and won’t be able to change it as they will not like everything about you.
To have a successful friendship/marriage you have to be able to negotiate and compromise when necessary.
You have to remain open and flexible. People and things change based on situations that arise.
Another consideration on making a marriage successful is to agree on the roles you each have within the marriage.
Although there are traditional roles of the male and female in marriages today they vary based on the two peoples outlook.
Expectations in terms of duties in the union should be made clear so there is no confusion.
Many marriages have this issue as a source of conflict.
This is because the roles and expectations of what the husband expects of the wife and vice-versa are not made clear in the beginning.
You both have to agree on the roles within the marriage to make it work.
For example is he the sole bread provider or does the wife work out of the house as well?
Does he do laundry and pick up after himself or is that the wife’s duty.
Although these are traditional examples they are also things that affect both parties in a marriage.
Now, this brings us to sexual expectations in a marriage.
Partners have to agree totally on how they will be with each other sexually and intimately within a marriage.
This is a big, big issue and prevents infidelity.
This is where both partners decide if they will be monogamous. They will decide what each other will do or not do in the bed room.
Decisions will be agreed upon what they will allow the other to do.
This aspect in a marriage creates intimacy and trust between the two people involved.
When both parties are in sync with their sexual expectations both in giving and receiving you have two happy parties in the marriage.
It’s also good to be physical with each other. Touches and hugs can keep the love alive.
In conclusion a marriage that is lasting and good has two people that are on the same page.
They have the same vision and goals for the marriage and work together to accomplish them.